This morning I had a client who is dealing with difficult people in her workplace.  My client has a tendency to react badly and look like the instigator.  I tried to counsel her that instead of blaming them that she needed to look inside herself for the way she was reacting.   

I could relate to this particular type of client on so many levels.  In my past interactions, I, too reacted in anger.  I react period and looked like the idiot. 

I had a recent experience that would explain how much work it took not to commit murder one.  A former friend of mine and I had entered into a business deal.  This person was very laxed on her part of it.  This person did not write up a written agreement as I had requested.  They also did not show up for final business meetings in order to finish up the project nor did this person meet the deadlines.  All in all, I would not do business with this person in the future and wished I hadn't signed up for the deal in the first place.  When I told this person I was ending the deal, they became very angry and volatile.  They were bordering on restraining order behavior.  To every one email I wrote, this person wrote four scathing, nasty email threatening me at every turn.  I had paid this person half of the money and they wanted their other half. 

In one of their correspondence, they wrote they wanted no more communication etc.  So I complied because I did not want to deal with this person on any level.  I also decided to pay them off.  We decided to meet on a particular day.  I knew I had to be the consistent one after I received another email from this person making excuses as to why they were having difficulty, etc.  I stood by my word and original plan on meeting on that particular day.  I received a self-righteous email.  I did not react to it as this person wanted me to and played it off. 

We met on that particular day.  I was nervous as hell.  I said as little as possible with the final meeting.  I had this particular person sign a Release that they had received the money and the deal was closed.  This person insulted me and called me vulgar names.  I just walked away relieved that my dealings with them were over.

I learned a lot from this particular deal.  I decideswho stays in my life.  I control how I react to others and that determines the outcome.  It is none of my business what this particular individual thinks of me. (This is easier said than done for me as I am a people pleaser).  I wish this person well and pray for them daily but I do not need this energy in my life. 

Although it easier said than done, I have to live with me.  I walked away from this deal learning to trust my initial first gut reaction which was to stay away from this type of individual and that no one needs to treat me in a bad way only if I let them...

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