Toxic Bullies in the Workplace
I just read a recent article which stated that over 90% of workplace bullies are promoted or in some other way rewarded for their inappropriate behavior in Corporate America.
That is no surprise to me for I have felt for a very long time throughout my career that the bullies often got their way and seemed to thrive no matter how much turmoil they caused in others lives.
Toxic bosses run rampant over others now as much as they did in the past. Although there are new laws on the books to ward against those who create unhealthy workplaces they are little used because most people are afraid to do so. When they file discrimination suits or suits of harassment they are almost always blackballed and find it impossible to advance further in their careers.
My clients tell me of outrageous behavior from their subordinates and their bosses at work. I can only say there are techniques that you can use but they are not always enough to deter a true bully.
I have read a wonderful book called "Snakes in Suits" that defines this problem perfectly and I highly recommend reading this book for it will make you aware of the tactics that psychopaths use to manipulate others.
How is it that these kinds of people are allowed to remain in leadership positions? The answer (unfortunately) is quite simple. We let them and Corporate America seems to put them in key positions. This is changing but the change is slow in coming. I have read that there are new tests now that are being conducted to discover psychopathic behavior before the person is hired. Let's hope this trend continues.
There are numerous reasons we allow them to run roughshod over us but the majority of the time it is because we need our job and we are fearful we might not find another.
You have to wake up to the fact that the situation with a bully probably will not improve a great deal unless you confront the situation and take steps to move on. You can document and record and report them to the Human Resources Department and I highly recommend you do all of that but mostly you have to decide if it is worth your mental and physical health to stay in a job that is toxic to you.
Once you face your demon so to speak and firmly decide you are not going to allow them to poop on you again then you are in the right frame of mind to make a change. You have to draw your line in the sand and let your demons know that you are taking away their permission to abuse you. That can happen in many ways. You can tell him/her that you will discuss this with them at a later time and then ask the Human Resources Representative to be there in a meeting between all parties involved. You can prepare incident reports to show the HR people so you can show dates and times the abuse occurs etc. The most important thing is to let the offender know that you are not "hurt" by their actions but that you point out their actions are in violation of labor laws.
When you take action be prepared for the abuse to escalate however for true bullies do not give up and will find other ways to harass you. The ultimate fact is that you will probably have to seek employment elsewhere if the company is not willing to reprimand and sanction the person who is offending.
If they are not willing to do that then by all means seek employment elsewhere and refuse to give the bully anymore of your energy.
Blessings of Courage and Strength in the face of Adversity for you this day.
Rosie
Tags: Metaphysical Counseling Relationship
